So many feuds between families and friends, so many conflicts between nations, so many squabbles between couples could possibly be prevented if one or both parties would choose to forgive the other. And yet the core issue that causes distance and disconnection in many relationships is an inability, or maybe just an unwillingness, to forgive. How do I truly forgive someone who has caused me pain? And how does holding onto bitterness impact my relationships?
In any relationship there will inevitably be flaws and shortcomings to endure. Whenever a relationship becomes unhealthy, it is not uncommon to try to point out the other person’s failures or accuse them of being the source of the problem. But what if it’s me? What if there is something that I could improve about myself that would improve this connection? We’re going to spend the next several weeks at Flagstone taking an honest look at ourselves and discovering what we personally can be doing to improve the health of our relationships.
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Anger is a natural way for us to react when we feel we've been wronged in some way or something hurtful has happened to someone we care about. If we deal with that anger in a healthy way, it ceases to be a problem for us. But if we hold onto that bitterness and allow that frustration to continue to grow and fester inside of us, we find ourselves slowly fading into feelings of resentment. Why is resentment such a harmful emotion? And how do I reverse the slow fade into resentment when I'm still feeling angry and hurt?
While there are some temptations we face in life that we see immediately and deal with quickly, there are other common struggles that often creep into our lives slowly. They don't seem very strong or dangerous, and we begin to allow these things to slowly take over our hearts and dictate our actions. We might even justify our choices or try to convince ourselves "it's not a big deal." Eventually these issues become big problems that impact our relationships, our families, even our faith. How do we recognize when we are slowly fading away from our values and our faith? And how do we stop the slow fade and reverse the impact it's having on our lives?